Love CAN win

Love Wins. The celebratory statement after the Supreme Court’s ruling legalizing marriage equality was handed down this past week. What a beautiful statement in a world that is, as it always has been, burdened by hate. Two simple words that, if taken to heart can transform our existence on this planet.

Which is why I’m here to co-opt that phrase for my spiritually evangelical purposes.

Those two words are what we are missing as we struggle to find our way forward in these very confusing times. The world seems to be exploding in violence and conflict. We are in the middle of another potentially explosive racial divide here in America.

Last week, 9 people died at Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church in Charleston, South Carolina when a young, white man who was motivated by racial hatred, shot them while telling them they “had to go”.

He spent over an hour with them in Bible study, where they welcomed him into their church and their group with open arms. When he was arraigned on these murders, various family members of the victims showed up to tell him that even though their hearts were broken, they forgave him and would pray for his soul. Love wins.

This is what religion teaches. These people live their faith in a way that most cannot or will not. Most of us call immediately for revenge before justice. We want to strike back at those who cause us pain. It’s all about ‘getting even’. Jesus advised turning the other cheek. Buddha said hate doesn’t dispel hate; only love dispels hate. Dr. Martin Luther King told us that only love can drive out hate. Yet, in times of great pain and anguish, we ignore those who we admire for their wisdom.

I honestly believe that some of the events of the past week may be the beginning of a tipping point toward love winning. I’ve felt such despair over so many global events and issues. I don’t even need to list the things that are happening that cause me to want to weep or vomit every time I read or watch the news. You know. You feel it too, but you feel powerless.

This is why this past week is so powerful. In just a few short years, gay marriage has become not only accepted by a majority of Americans, but it is now the law of the land. I know that many are not happy about it and try as I might, I cannot understand their opposition. How can allowing more commitment, more love, more families to form ever be a sin? How can allowing all of our fellow humans to have the same legal protections that straight humans have had, be a bad thing?

You can of course, remain true to your religious beliefs by following them. All of them. Because it seems to me that Jesus’ main message to his flock was Love Wins. In the face of anger, crime, bigotry, hatred, insults, misunderstanding, miscommunication, impatience, somebody cutting you off in traffic or irritating you by paying with a check at the supermarket, Love Wins.

That’s it. Two words that we all need to adopt as our mantra going forward. WE are the ones that have to fix what’s broken. Don’t rely on politicians or pundits or various know-it-alls who populate our media and culture. YOU. ME. We have to start loving our fellow humans, particularly when they irritate or insult or even attack us.

This is the hard stuff that we have to face as spiritual beings having a human experience. You can think and analyze and ask why, as I often do; as I constantly do. Let me do that for you, if you’d like; it’s a dirty job, but I’m happy to carry that burden. The bottom line is that we need to be more forgiving, more compassionate, more kind and more charitable to the other residents of this planet, be they human, animal, plant, etc.

This week gave us a beautiful lesson in the midst of tragedy and triumph for gay rights. Take this lesson and run with it. Spread it around. Re-think some of your beliefs. Share this blog post freely. Let’s start a bigger movement.

Love Wins.

To listen to audio of this blog:

How about a mid-year reset?

 

I wrote this last December and realized this week, that I had abandoned much of what I pledged for 2012. As we get into the “silly season” of a presidential election I thought it might be relevant reminder for a lot of us, so I’m re-posting.  Or maybe it’s just a reminder to me that I had certain goals for this year and  since we’re halfway through, I need a kick in the pants to live them.

So, my friends how about a mid-year reset?

The week between Christmas and New Year’s Day is kind of a netherworld between regret over the past year and the exciting potential to begin anew.  Time to mull over what worked and what didn’t, while you try and formulate the way forward into another year.

Maybe the past year was rough, maybe it didn’t live up to your expectations, maybe 2011 flew by and you didn’t lose the 20 pounds or get a better job or save as much money as you had hoped.  The beauty is that we all get a mulligan; a do-over in 2012.  Every year, every day for that matter, we can hit the re-set button and start again.

2011 was a better year for me than 2010; I made some personal progress in some areas that I felt that I needed to work on.  I developed some new skills and hobbies.  I let go of some stuff and I re-connected with some old friends.  As we all must plot the way forward into 2012, my goals for the coming year include developing more humility and grace.  I admire those traits so much in others and they don’t come easily to me.

You see, I have a tendency to evangelize.  I try to bend people to my way of seeing or doing things.  When I see the light, I want everyone to see that same light, to have that same epiphany that I’ve experienced.  It’s my ego, mixed with an equal part of wanting people to be happier, less frazzled, less scattered.  There are some philosophies and behaviors that I feel strongly about and I’m compelled to force them on others.  No more.

What I’ve realized is that I can only control me; I can only impose my will or my beliefs or my knowledge or my epiphanies on me.  Look, a lot of you have lived your lives this way for years.  I’m usually a little late to the party, when it comes to self-realization and self-control.  I got here through study,  introspection,  observation and finally, acceptance.  People are gonna do, what people are gonna do, regardless of how I think they should behave.

The basic message of Christmas is what crystallized this for me: “Peace on earth, goodwill toward men”.  Christians say they believe in Jesus as their personal savior;  his message fills their hearts and their lives, yet many Christians seem to ignore what I believe is Jesus’ main message: 1. We are all sinners and 2. Love thy neighbor. I don’t study the Bible (that’s a whole other post, my friends), but I’ve read it and those two statements seem to distill it all down into a very simple premise that I intend to follow, even though Jesus is not my personal savior.

My no-nonsense husband put it this way:  “God didn’t mean for it to be so complicated”.  YESSSSSS!  So, whether you are religious or a searcher, like me, it’s this:  Take care of your own business and stay out of everyone else’s.  We’re all flawed, messy humans and the only person that you can fix or control, is YOU.  That’s it.

We can guide, we can teach, we can influence and then, we must accept.  Simple.  We make life complicated and frustrating when we list all of the things that we ‘wish’ other people would do:  drive better, be more polite, go to church, don’t go to church, believe in God, don’t believe in God, vote differently, spend money, save money, raise your kids better, blah, blah, blah.  Look, we’re all ‘that person’; you know, the imperfect one.

So, in 2012, I will work on me; I vow to stop bitching about everyone else because that takes away valuable time from my true work.  I won’t worry about other people’s sexual orientation/diet/political views/spending habits/parenting skills/religion/work ethic.  To paraphrase the J-man, who so many of you follow, “it’s time to worry about the plank in our own eye, dudes”.  Simple?  Yesssssssss!

I’ll let you be you; now let me be me…..

The week between Christmas and New Year’s Day is kind of a netherworld between regret over the past year and the exciting potential to begin anew.  Time to mull over what worked and what didn’t, while you try and formulate the way forward into another year.

Maybe the past year was rough, maybe it didn’t live up to your expectations, maybe 2011 flew by and you didn’t lose the 20 pounds or get a better job or save as much money as you had hoped.  The beauty is that we all get a mulligan; a do-over in 2012.  Every year, every day for that matter, we can hit the re-set button and start again.

2011 was a better year for me than 2010; I made some personal progress in some areas that I felt that I needed to work on.  I developed some new skills and hobbies.  I let go of some stuff and I re-connected with some old friends.  As we all must plot the way forward into 2012, my goals for the coming year include developing more humility and grace.  I admire those traits so much in others and they don’t come easily to me.

You see, I have a tendency to evangelize.  I try to bend people to my way of seeing or doing things.  When I see the light, I want everyone to see that same light, to have that same epiphany that I’ve experienced.  It’s my ego, mixed with an equal part of wanting people to be happier, less frazzled, less scattered.  There are some philosophies and behaviors that I feel strongly about and I’m compelled to force them on others.  No more.

What I’ve realized is that I can only control me; I can only impose my will or my beliefs or my knowledge or my epiphanies on me.  Look, a lot of you have lived your lives this way for years.  I’m usually a little late to the party, when it comes to self-realization and self-control.  I got here through study,  introspection,  observation and finally, acceptance.  People are gonna do, what people are gonna do, regardless of how I think they should behave.

The basic message of Christmas is what crystallized this for me: “Peace on earth, goodwill toward men”.  Christians say they believe in Jesus as their personal savior;  his message fills their hearts and their lives, yet many Christians seem to ignore what I believe is Jesus’ main message: 1. We are all sinners and 2. Love thy neighbor. I don’t study the Bible (that’s a whole other post, my friends), but I’ve read it and those two statements seem to distill it all down into a very simple premise that I intend to follow, even though Jesus is not my personal savior.

My no-nonsense husband put it this way:  “God didn’t mean for it to be so complicated”.  YESSSSSS!  So, whether you are religious or a searcher, like me, it’s this:  Take care of your own business and stay out of everyone else’s.  We’re all flawed, messy humans and the only person that you can fix or control, is YOU.  That’s it.

We can guide, we can teach, we can influence and then, we must accept.  Simple.  We make life complicated and frustrating when we list all of the things that we ‘wish’ other people would do:  drive better, be more polite, go to church, don’t go to church, believe in God, don’t believe in God, vote differently, spend money, save money, raise your kids better, blah, blah, blah.  Look, we’re all ‘that person’; you know, the imperfect one.

So, in 2012, I will work on me; I vow to stop bitching about everyone else because that takes away valuable time from my true work.  I won’t worry about other people’s sexual orientation/diet/political views/spending habits/parenting skills/religion/work ethic.  To paraphrase the J-man, who so many of you follow, “it’s time to worry about the plank in our own eye, dudes”.  Simple?  Yesssssssss!