Present Tense

On stillness…..

More stream of consciousness…bear with me as I oil up my writing chops again:)iss-39_pre-winter_storm_southwestern_australia_b

I’ve decided and it was reinforced during a reiki session, that I have to limit my news/internet/bullshit.  It’s causing me suffering and making me angry and agitated.  It’s also clouding my thinking.  I need cleanliness and clarity in my brain.

The election was a perfect example of allowing pollution into my third eye.  I KNEW that it didn’t matter who won and that my vote was inconsequential.  Turns out my intuition was correct because I did end up casting a ‘hold your nose’ vote for HRC and she lost.  HA!  If that’s not a reinforcement to listen to my guides, then I don’t know what is.

NOBODY thought she would lose.  NOBODY.  And yet, it was the fates slapping us down, blowing up conventional wisdom and within my soul and my deep knowing, I was correct.  I knew this was going to be a disruptive election. I felt it coming for a few years and I should have just walked my path and allowed.  But, I was influenced by the buzz, the spin, the hysteria surrounding this whole evolution.

I knew it and felt it months, no, years ago.  This is why I need to limit my consumption of this addictive brew of junk that is swirling.  It’s no difference than how I feed myself food:  No factory farmed meats, mostly organic, as local as possible.  I avoid toxins as best I can and yet, I allow them into my eyes, ears, psyche and heart.  What goes in, comes out and if we nourish ourselves properly, we are clean and clear and able to function optimally; physically, spiritually, emotionally.

During reiki this week, I was told by one of my spirit guides “Don’t underestimate the power of being still”.  Yes.  Stillness is where we find ourselves, our essence, our authentic soul/spirit.  There is no other way.  The constant drumbeat of media, internet, anger, outrage, with so much of it based on lies, is damaging to us.  Damaging to our collective psyche and energy.  We need space and silence and time to process the sensory stimulation of modern life.

When I was working, I had a very distinct and rigid routine every morning: wake up, brush teeth, let dogs out, get a cup of coffee, head to basement, prepare for morning radio show, 20 minutes of yoga, 20 minutes of meditation and GO!

I’ve lost that discipline and I miss it.  I have Saturn in Capricorn, so  a routine and even rigid boundaries around diet, exercise, discipline, even restriction, appeal to me.  My life is sloppy right now.  Not horrible, not tragic, but sloppy because I’m not doing what I need to do to function optimally and it’s like dragging a rock around.

But, that is me.  Everyone has to find that groove; the one that makes you feel like you’re powerful and lubricated and engaged. Maybe that’s playing music or painting or long walks or reading or cooking or just sitting with a beautifully fragrant candle.  It’s all about disconnecting with the chaos of modern life and re-connecting with the stillness within all of us.  It can be so hard to find.  But, it’s there.

We make life so much harder than it needs to be, by the stories we tell ourselves.  That old nemesis of awakening and enlightenment, The Human Condition is a tough one to wrangle into submission, eh?  Why have we allowed our lives to devolve into such an unnatural place?  Stillness will light the way out.

December 7, 2016 Posted by | Musings | , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

You have changed me…

cropSince announcing my retirement from The Dom and Jane Show earlier this week, my inbox has been full of well-wishes and very kind notes. I sort of feel as if I’m being allowed to attend my own funeral.

I’ve had a job in the public eye for over 30 years, which is the majority of my adult life. I do not consider myself famous by any stretch, but on any given day, several hundred thousand people tune into our show. Some love it, some hate it and anyone who is in the public eye, soon learns that the ones who are angry, disappointed or flat-out pissed, are usually the ones who are motivated to reach out.

For many years, those kinds of letters, emails, phone calls and now Facebook messages, penetrated pretty deeply for me. In my job as a radio host, I’ve been judged and critiqued by listeners, co-workers, consultants, clients, friends, family and occasionally, people who’ve never even heard my shows (“Ugh, I can’t stand anything on the radio that isn’t NPR”).

So, even though I’ve been successful and the Dom and Jane Show exceeded my wildest professional expectations, many of us who work in the media can be a little shell-shocked because we mostly hear from people who don’t like us. That’s why the past week has been so incredible.

The amount of love and appreciation that’s been sent my way has filled my spirit with a great deal of gratitude. I love that our show and my participation has had such a positive effect on people. I’ve heard from so many who listened for years with their kids on the way to school, from people who got a few laughs that eased whatever sorrow or pain they were dealing with and from so many who said they were sad that I was leaving, then told me to go forth and enjoy the rest of my life.

I’ve been so touched by the personal stories of how our show was a part of so many lives and it added a dimension to many of you, that I really didn’t quite understand over the years. We sit in a studio and talk to a void and there are times, I’m embarrassed to admit, that we forget that you’re out there. We can tend to get a little full of our selves.

You told me that you think of our little radio show as ‘family’ and that really touched me, since I know you all have real families and how much they mean to you, so to be included is a gift and one that I may not have treasured as I should have. You all have dreams and hurts and problems and crises and joy and tragedy and triumph and there may have been times when I didn’t celebrate or mourn those with you, even though you celebrated and empathized with me as I struggled with these same universal human issues.

So, thank you. Thank you for the lovely notes, for the funny and sometimes, sad memories, for reaching out to lift me up during kind of an emotional and precarious time as I stand on the edge of a huge life change. Anything that The Dom and Jane Show may have given you, you have repaid me a thousand times over.

As I head into my last 5 shows, I will do so with a full heart, knowing that I made an impact on you and more importantly, you made an impact on me.

November 15, 2014 Posted by | Musings | , , , , , , , , | 37 Comments

Geez, why so angry?

 

I wrote this well over a year ago, hoping that it was merely a moment in time; that people were scared and angry due to the economy, world events, etc.  I figured that we would all calm down, open our minds and start to LISTEN to other viewpoints, rather than just knee jerk back to our political/philosophical/religiously inspired ‘dogma’. Sadly, we have not.  Why must we fight about EVERY SINGLE ISSUE?  From chicken sandwiches to guns to taxes to politicians wives and on and on and on.  There is an urge to be “right”, when we would be better served seeking seeking “truth” and that crosses party lines. Not only do we disagree, many feel the need to be downright nasty about it.  We are but specks, with a very short visit on this Earth.  Perhaps it would be wise to listen and process other viewpoints.  Honestly, it can’t hurt….

Do you find yourself swinging into the ‘angry’ zone more often than before? We flawed humans tend to run the gamut of emotions from day to day, or even minute to minute, depending on hormones. It’s all part of our wonderful humanity, but I’m wondering about what’s going on with us lately.

Turn on the news, you see angry mobs…everywhere. Not that unusual I guess, since cable news’ bread and butter is conflict, but the anger and hostility aimed at everyone who doesn’t completely share your viewpoints, whether friends, family, co-workers or complete strangers has become distressing and for me, overwhelming.

What’s with all the anger?  I like to pull a good Buddhist quote out of my butt every now and then and here’s one:  “Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned”.  Anger ain’t healthy for you or for the target of your anger and yet,  anger has become pervasive in everyday discourse.  It seems to have become a requirement in ANY and ALL conversations about current events, politics and even stuff that’s not really that important, like sports or pop culture.

I have a pretty intense personality and am usually game for a good argument.  I’ve been described as angry or hostile or mean over my many years of yapping on the radio, but as I observe modern media, via TV, radio and the internet, I look and sound like “Little Mary Sunshine” compared to not just other media types, but the ‘common folks’ who opine via chat sites and Facebook.

It got so bad recently, that I pretty much gave up on my ‘public persona’ Facebook page;  I couldn’t abide the nastiness that has become the norm.  It’s not even the hostility that got to me, but rather the ignorance and total rejection of any facts or opinions that might contradict or give clarity to the posts.  There seems to be an epidemic of groupthink on both sides of the political spectrum and in my experience, things are never so black and white on major issues and philosophies.  Using anger as your filter can greatly cut down on your understanding of other opinions, people and yes, facts; it can also be very bad for your mental and emotional health.

Maybe my perspective comes from being in the media for so long.  I’ve had to publicly state and defend my opinions for so many years, that I have developed a pretty thick skin.  Most people who enter the fray, mostly on the internet, aren’t used to being publicly challenged or argued with and I notice that they immediately start in with the nasty stuff.  I find that a rational, challenging debate is fun; pissing matches are not.

Perhaps it’s purely the passing of time; we heard it all of our young lives:  “I’m older and wiser than you and one day you’ll understand”.  Everyday that passes does give me a bit more to go on in the wisdom department.  Life is short and once you pass 50, that road ahead looks like a cul-de-sac, rather than the superhighway that was laid out in front of you at 25.  Hot, burning anger is a waste of my time.   Although I do admit to a fairly constant, low-level annoyance with people, I am much more willing to try and see their side, unless they’re trying to shove it forcefully down my throat, while calling me names.

So, lots of you have found a passion or a purpose in anger of late and I’m certainly not in any position to talk you out of it, but try a little tenderness instead, along with some deep breathing before you speak or hit ‘send’. Oh, and think about puppies and hot chocolate chip cookes; that always puts me in a better mood.  Simple, no?

July 28, 2012 Posted by | Musings | , , , | Leave a comment

Geez, why so angry?

Do you find yourself swinging into the ‘angry’ zone more often than before? We flawed humans tend to run the gamut of emotions from day to day, or even minute to minute, depending on hormones. It’s all part of our wonderful humanity, but I’m wondering about what’s going on with us lately.

Turn on the news, you see angry mobs…everywhere. Not that unusual I guess, since cable news’ bread and butter is conflict, but the anger and hostility aimed at everyone who doesn’t completely share your viewpoints, whether friends, family, co-workers or complete strangers has become distressing and for me, overwhelming.

What’s with all the anger?  I like to pull a good Buddhist quote out of my butt every now and then and here’s one:  “Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned”.  Anger ain’t healthy for you or for the target of your anger and yet,  anger has become pervasive in everyday discourse.  It seems to have become a requirement in ANY and ALL conversations about current events, politics and even stuff that’s not really that important, like sports or pop culture.

I have a pretty intense personality and am usually game for a good argument.  I’ve been described as angry or hostile or mean over my many years of yapping on the radio, but as I observe modern media, via TV, radio and the internet, I look and sound like “Little Mary Sunshine” compared to not just other media types, but the ‘common folks’ who opine via chat sites and Facebook.

It got so bad recently, that I pretty much gave up on my ‘public persona’ Facebook page;  I couldn’t abide the nastiness that has become the norm.  It’s not even the hostility that got to me, but rather the ignorance and total rejection of any facts or opinions that might contradict or give clarity to the posts.  There seems to be an epidemic of groupthink on both sides of the political spectrum and in my experience, things are never so black and white on major issues and philosophies.  Using anger as your filter can greatly cut down on your understanding of other opinions, people and yes, facts; it can also be very bad for your mental and emotional health.

Maybe my perspective comes from being in the media for so long.  I’ve had to publicly state and defend my opinions for so many years, that I have developed a pretty thick skin.  Most people who enter the fray, mostly on the internet, aren’t used to being publicly challenged or argued with and I notice that they immediately start in with the nasty stuff.  I find that a rational, challenging debate is fun; pissing matches are not.

Perhaps it’s purely the passing of time; we heard it all of our young lives:  “I’m older and wiser than you and one day you’ll understand”.  Everyday that passes does give me a bit more to go on in the wisdom department.  Life is short and once you pass 50, that road ahead looks like a cul-de-sac, rather than the superhighway that was laid out in front of you at 25.  Hot, burning anger is a waste of my time.   Although I do admit to a fairly constant, low-level annoyance with people, I am much more willing to try and see their side, unless they’re trying to shove it forcefully down my throat, while calling me names.

So, lots of you have found a passion or a purpose in anger of late and I’m certainly not in any position to talk you out of it, but try a little tenderness instead, along with some deep breathing before you speak or hit ‘send’. Oh, and think about puppies and hot chocolate chip cookes; that always puts me in a better mood.  Simple, no?

March 19, 2011 Posted by | Musings | , , , | 7 Comments

   

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