Present Tense


Early morning musings as I listen to cello music shuffling on my Echo, thanks to Alexa fulfilling my wish. She is like a genie in a bottle.

I got a new tattoo yesterday; what I think is a very beautiful, stylized, abstract depiction of the most beautiful of the planets, Saturn.

In mythology/astrology, the god Saturn is all about hard work, discipline, timeliness, rules, strong foundations, boundaries and as I’ve written before, he strongly forces us to “get our shit together”. He reminds us that time is short; we aren’t here forever on this earth.

He has saved my life over and over again, as I tend to reject many of the above structures now and again, often to my detriment. (But then again, often, to my delight and expansion!)

What better way to express my gratitude and honor his influence than to commit him to my skin. Now, it’s not a perfectly accurate depiction and I’m hoping with him being a stickler for the rules and all, he will allow me some wiggle room on this.

I thought about this tat for a long time and researched designs and artists. I sat with it for about a year. I had even made an appointment with another artist in the spring and cancelled at the last minute. But, I knew I would get it.

Well, the time seemed right as Saturn entered the sign of Capricorn in my 12th house (I know mumbo jumbo to most of you…let’s just say it’s significant as I move forward into my second adulthood….for further insight, just ask. I’ll talk astrology forever…).

MANY of you have expressed to me something along the lines of “I want a tattoo, but I don’t know what I want. It has to be the perfect design. I want a tattoo, but I’m afraid it will hurt or I want a tattoo, but I want it to have something to do with my kids”.

Here’s the deal. Stop talking about it. Stop making excuses and if you REALLY want one, get one. It’s very simple. At the risk of being sued by Nike, JUST DO IT!

A tattoo is very personal. What speaks to you? What represents you? What motivates you or activates your core values and beliefs? Or what are your hobbies? Your passions? What symbolizes the path you want to follow or motivates you to be a better person, if that’s your goal?

And it doesn’t HAVE to be perfect. Nothing is perfect and if you have several themes you want to express, get several tats.

And yes, it does hurt. Some places more than others. But what DOESN’T hurt in life? The phrase “No Pain, No Gain” isn’t just a bumper sticker. It’s a sage reminder that in order to get what we want or to express ourselves or fully live OUR authentic lives, there is sacrifice involved. Period.

So, now you see that I’m not really just talking about tattoos, right?:) And that in fact, I’m channeling my personal spirit animal, Saturn.

If you want something, you HAVE TO ACT! We all sit around and think and wonder and make excuses. Or wait for someone to hand deliver our dreams and desires. Lay the groundwork and get it done.

Saturn is cracking the whip and will be for the next 2.5 years in Capricorn. He is always working on us, but in this sign, it’s particularly intense.

So, waffling and excuses and ‘somedays’ just won’t cut it. You may already be feeling this and what I would encourage is that you follow it. Act on your urges to set some boundaries, build some structure and discipline, to even the smallest duties.

That is the flow that we’re in. Resistance to Saturn is futile. He always wins:) It’s taken me the better part of 50 years to get that message and now, he’s right there on my left forearm, reminding me: “Jane…time is short; get your shit together”.

January 7, 2018 Posted by | Musings | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

What is ‘thankful’?

Thankful.  What does that mean exactly?

I think that thankfulness comes in various degrees and layers;  thankful for really great things, like new babies or new jobs or a clean bill of health.  And then there is the secondary thankfulness where we’re glad that things aren’t worse or that we’re making progress in a difficult situation.

I think that maybe that’s what separates people who are happy from those who can’t quite settle into their lives.  Most of the people I know who have as their mantra “it could be worse”, mean it.  But, some of us  get stuck; we dwell on the inevitable and universal imperfections, allowing it to corrode our lives and rust away the girders of the bridge to peace and happiness.

We all want things to work out perfectly; for our lives to be well-oiled machines featuring lots of rainbows and unicorns.  Unfortunately, we sometimes don’t recognize the rainbows and unicorns when we have them.  We think “it could always be better; this isn’t my perfect vision”.

Which is where thankfulness comes in.  Every day.  Find something, even in the midst of irritation, tragedy and yes, even unbearable pain, that you can say your gratefuls for.  I think it will make us happier.  I know it will make us happier and at the very least, it will make us less prickly.

My husband and I have both been mourning the loss of our dog, Chili.  This past weekend, we saw my brother’s dog, who is 14 and starting to lose her quality of life.  Bladder issues, she doesn’t see well, no appetite.  I told my husband  “I’m grateful that Chili won’t have to go through this kind of long-term deterioration”.

It doesn’t make it hurt less, but it’s truth.  She will be spared that kind of suffering.  Do I wish she were still alive?  Every single minute of every day. But, if we dig, we can always find some little nugget and say a thank you to the universe.  Baby steps.  Silver linings.

Some people are born with this ability; the clear-eyed view that life is never perfect, but it will toss us little crumbs of light if we’re open and clear.  Some have to remind themselves to look under or beyond the dark cloud that can obscure the light.  Some just choose to live in the dark.

Life is hard and disappointing and challenging and painful, so have another piece of apple pie ala mode and remember that it could be worse.

The last piece of pie could be mincemeat.  That would truly be a tragedy.

December 1, 2013 Posted by | Musings | , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Chances…take as many as you need

    “We as human beings, I think cannot stand in judgement as to how many chances you get”—Oprah.chance

    Second chances.  We’re big on that in this country.  In fact, we tend to root for the fallen to make a comeback.  We love it so much that I think we knock people down to see if they can get back up.  But, there seems to be a rule that you can only have ONE second chance.  After that, you’re broken.

     I’m with Oprah.  I love second chances…and third chances…and fourth chances.  Because without them, I’d be nothing.  I’ve had a lot of second chances in my life; I’m a slow learner when it comes to appropriate and productive behavior.

      Thankfully, we all get an infinite number of do-overs, whether you realize it or not.  Every minute, every hour, every day.  Stop and start over; as many times as you need to. Granted, others may give up on us.  They may decide that we’ve run out of chances, but we really haven’t.  Maybe we’ve exhausted their benevolence, but we keep trudging on.  What else is there to do?

      We humans are a flawed, fussy and judgmental bunch.  We’re quick to exclaim ‘nobody’s perfect’ when we screw up, but then expect perfection in others.  Or ourselves.   Nobody’s perfect.  Not even close.

      In fact, I believe that the most successful people, no matter how you define success, are the ones that have started over the most.  They realize that life is full of second chances.  That we can start over again and again and again.  There is no set amount.  Oprah is right.

     Start taking chances.  As many as you need.

August 7, 2013 Posted by | Musings | , , , , | 13 Comments


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